Clinical psychologist Ingrid Clayton explains how trauma can lead to fawning — the instinct to suppress our own needs, values, and desires for the sake of safety.

Traumatic events like natural disasters, traffic accidents, physical assault, or psychological abuse commonly trigger one of our survival mechanisms: fight, flight, or freeze.

Sometimes, however, none of the three main trauma responses are available to us, especially if we're children and the threat comes from someone who is supposed to take care of us. This is when the fourth option kicks in: fawning.

Ingrid Clayton is a clinical psychologist with over 15 years of experience working with trauma.

In her 2025 book, Fawning, Clayton explains how complex trauma leads us to feel safer abandoning ourselves and our needs in favor of appeasing others.